January 2018 - Life as Mrs. Wilson

31 January, 2018

Conrad These Days

January 31, 2018 0
Conrad These Days
Conrad is a little over a year old (15 months) and is growing and developing sooo quickly. I feel like this stage of life, more than ever, I am catching myself being that mom that can't stop rambling about how FAST time goes by. It really is an interesting thing, to feel like the newborn stage was both a lifetime ago, and also just seconds ago. This has definitely been the most fulfilling stage of being a mother for me, and while I still struggle with my confidence, I do feel that Conrad and I are comfortably finding our rhythm and routine in life together.

Here are 10 things about Conrad these days:

1. He L O V E S alllll the healthy stuff. Seriously you guys, his favorite foods include kale, almonds, raisins, kiwi, and spinach -- he definitely did not get that from me, that's for sure! This kid is a little health nut and I adore that about him (but secretly hope he'll enjoy sneaking some icecream with me every once in a while in the future years).
2. Conrad loves things to be clean and in order, just like his mama. 
3. The kisses. You guys, the KISSES. He is constantly blowing kisses to us and even sometimes to strangers in Barnes & Noble, and will sometimes grab our faces and go in for a big ol' slobbery kiss. This kid is full of love and has the sweetest heart.
4. Peg + Cat is his favorite show. We may or may not have the theme song downloaded on our phones to help ease those I'm-stuck-in-a-car-seat-so-time-for-a-meltdown moments.
5. Conrad has more energy than I can even wrap my head around. He plays hard and loves to run.
6. He is CRAZY stubborn, and quite possibly more stubborn than I am.
7. He's also incredibly resilient, and is the epitome of 'getting back up on the horse' after each fall. Any time he gets hurt, he'll let me hold him for a minute tops, then go back and try to conquer what he was doing. He has come up with some pretty creative solutions and I am always in awe (and usually exhausted) by his determination to succeed.
8. Rad LOVES music. Any music, really. We've tried to introduce him to just about every genre there is, and from every decade, and he seems to love it all. Anything by Michael Jackson will get some guaranteed dance moves, and if there's not music playing throughout the day, you can bet he'll start yelling at the Google Home to play something again.
9. He refuses to sleep without his blanket and stuffed monkey.
10. Conrad thinks piggy back rides, giving zurbers, and standing on his tippy toes are all hilarious. And that laugh, I could listen to it forever.
Conrad James: if you ever read this someday, I want you to know what a joy and blessing you are in my life. You are constantly making me smile and laugh, and watching your personality develop and unfold is so great. Never stop trying, keep loving hard, and always remember how incredible you are in my eyes. Mama loves you, baby boy.

22 January, 2018

To the Mom Who Feels Like She's Failing

January 22, 2018 0
To the Mom Who Feels Like She's Failing
To the mom who feels like she's failing,

I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I get it. I've been there, I am there, and I'll probably be there again.
To the mom who feels like she's failing, I spent all last week feeling the same way. And I want to talk about it, because I don't feel like we as mothers talk about it enough.

Last week was hard, I'm sure you can imagine. I was trying my best, doing everything I could, and yet I still felt like I was coming up short. And as I was holding my son, rocking him to sleep for his nap, I lost it.

All of the doubts and worries and questions started flooding my mind - am I reading to him enough? Should he be talking more by now? Is he getting everything he needs? Am I doing this too much, or that not enough? I felt so overwhelmed as I wondered if I'll ever be capable of giving him all that he needs and deserves and just felt so inadequate and so unqualified and so very much a failure. 

And as I was looking at my perfect son through tear filled eyes, wondering if I really was failing him as a mother, I remembered something I had read right after he was born:

"We need not worry about keeping it together, keeping it perfect, keeping a standard nobody can meet. All we need is to live our small moments with big love."
Small moments with big love. It's all we need. 
So to the mom who feels like she's failing, please remember those words. Please know that even if you don't feel like it right now, your best really is enough. You really are enough. You are one hundred percent, enough. 
Yes, there are going to be days, sometimes even weeks, where those feelings of self doubt might creep back in. But when they do, take a step back. Let go of the expectation of perfection. And live your small moments with big love. 
Last week I was rocking my son to sleep with tears of frustration in my eyes, but today I rocked my son to sleep - still with tears - but this time, tears of gratitude. Tears of joy. Tears of love. 
To the mom who feels like she's failing, you're not. You're doing the best you can, and that IS enough. So here's to getting up and trying again and believing and knowing that our best is enough, even when it gets hard -- especially when it gets hard. Here's to small moments with big love. Here's to you, mama. I promise you're not failing, you're doing great actually. Keep loving, keep trying. It's all going to work out. 

03 January, 2018

10 Talks by Thomas S. Monson That Changed Me For the Better

January 03, 2018 0
10 Talks by Thomas S. Monson That Changed Me For the Better
When I heard the news about our beloved prophet Thomas S. Monson passing away, I began thinking about all of the words he had shared in his life that truly impacted me. His spirit was joyful, powerful, and kind beyond belief. His words always resonated with me so deeply, and because of him, I learned to love the scriptures and gained a greater desire to read them. There are so many more incredible and inspired words he shared than what I have listed below, but here are 10 quotes from 10 talks by Thomas S. Monson that changed me for the better:
"As we arise each morning, let us determine to respond with love and kindness to whatever might come our way." Love - the Essence of the Gospel

"In the game of life a second effort is often required. The happy life is not ushered in at any age to the sound of drums and trumpets. It grows upon us year by year, little by little, until at last we realize that we have it. It is achieved in individuals not by flights to the moon or Mars, but by a body of work done so well that we can lift our heads with assurance and look the world in the eye. Of this be sure: You do not find the happy life...you make it."Faces and Attitudes

"We were not placed on this earth to walk alone."We Never Walk Alone

"From the depths of my soul and in all humility, I testify of the great gift which is our Father's plan for us. It is the one perfect path to peace and happiness."The Perfect Path to Happiness

"Our responsibility is to rise from mediocrity to competence, from failure to achievement. Our task is to become our best selves. One of God's greatest gifts to us is the joy of trying again, for no failure ever need be final." -The Will Within

"Let us relish life as we live it, find joy in the journey, and share our love with friends and family." Finding Joy in the Journey

"He will not always take your afflictions from you, but He will comfort and lead you with love through whatever storm you face."Looking Back and Moving Forward

"Rather than being judgmental and critical of each other, may we have the pure love of Christ for our fellow travelers in this journey through life."Charity Never Faileth

"I plead with you to have the courage to refrain from judging and criticizing those around you, as well as the courage to make certain everyone is included and feels loved and valued."May You Have Courage

"Remember, you are never alone. Never forget that you are loved. Never doubt that someone surely cares for you."A Time to Choose